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iPorn Threatens to Storm Apple Board Room

Says It Will Use Its 'Girls' to Convince iPhone Maker to Allow Porn App

09/14/2009

It’s not often we get to picture Steve Jobs & Co. fleeing from scantily clad women, but if iPorn makes good on a (hilarious) new threat, we suspect that’s exactly what will happen.

iPorn has developed a mobile application that can only be accessed by visiting the company’s site from a mobile phone. But, surprise, surprise, Apple Inc. (AAPL) has not been receptive to the idea of allowing the iPorn app on its venerable iPhone.

And iPorn doth protest.

“An app that is accessible only to adults would be much more effective and safe,” the company argues in a press release. “The whole world is waiting for Apple to stop controlling the type of applications its users are allowed to access.”

The best part is that iPorn “intends to send at least five iPorn girls to the Apple executive board room for a powwow.”

The company insists the visit “is being coordinated and is expected to take place in the next few weeks.”

We highly doubt that’s the case, but hey, prove us wrong. Of course, we’re curious how five women dressed in pretty much their altogether will get past security, much less gain access to Apple’s inner sanctum.

iPorn, for its part, seems unconcerned about such details.

“A person very familiar with the matter said Apple execs are likely to respond favorably to the iPorn girls' high level of motivation and willingness to bend over backwards in order to close a deal,” the company said, very tongue-in-cheek, in its statement.

Mmm hmmm. We can just see Jobs sticking around for that.


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